The following story was written by probably the two coolest 9th graders...Oh yes. Bunk.

What I Like About You 

“Bob!” Becky called with delight as she saw her love, moping over to her.  

“Hello Becky,” he replied, not looking his normal self… 

2 weeks earlier 

Becky was walking down the street, to Chef’s Table. Today was going to be a day that she would never forget. Today would be most inspirational moment she had ever known. TODAY WAS GOING TO BE THE DAY THAT SHE WOULD CRY ANGUISHING TEARS IN THE MOST BEAUTIFUL PLACE IN THE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was her second cousin, once removed, daughter’s son-in-law’s cousin’s (once removed, who were named Dick and Lucy) 50th anniversary. Becky couldn’t help it; she started sobbing before she even touched the doorknob to open the door, to go into Chef’s Table. People rushed from her side once she came in. 

“Hey everybody! Happy fifties!” Becky screamed, cried, and laughed. Everyone was so still and so silent, that you could see a fruit fly flying over someone’s delicious raspberry moosecake with chocolate frosting (I like frosting). “Oh! Delicious Raspberry Moosecake with chocolate frosting! I LIKE FROSTING!!!!!” This time Becky whispered, yelled, and dove.  

People moved out of the way, pushing tables, throwing chicken, anything to get away from that weird bipolar person who just entered the restaurant. Dick and Lucy, however, just stood looking at each other, loving one another. Together, forever, and in sickness and in health. Becky was confused. The D.R.M.C.W.C.F. (Delicious Raspberry Moosecake with chocolate frosting) was gone. It had been thrown in someone’s face in some fat lady’s attempt to run away. So Becky left the chaotic restaurant after congratulating the happy couple on their fifties.  

Later that night…. 

Becky was making unicorn. It was a lovely dish that included cinnamon, vanilla, and peppers in it. She liked all three of those things. After she put the unicorn in the oven to broil, she turned to the sink to wash her hands, unicorn was very messy to make. A FLASH OF LIGHTNING….. and there was a man behind her. A man that looked like….a WOLVERINE!!!!!!!!  

“Hello,” the creeper asked. Becky turned in surprise. 

“Hey!” she said, jumped up (for he was tall), and gave him a lovely hug. Then she turned back to the sink to continue washing her hands.  

“Do you know who I am?” the weirdified man asked very smoothly.  

“No,” Becky giggled, “but I know that yellow is the color of the sun.” 

“I’m Bob,” the guy said, not phased one bit. 

“I’m Becky! My friends call me Becky, at least they would if I had any friends,” said she, doing a very poor, very weird, imitation of Meg from the movie hit Hercules.  

“Do you know what you are?” Bob asked. Becky just looked at him strangely this time. “You are a mutant, Becky. A mutant with special powers, like me.” 

“You called me Becky!!!!” Becky jumped up and hugged him again. When she jumped down she wiped a tear from her eye. “No one’s ever said that to me before, I have a friend.” It was probably the most serious, most touching thing that Becky had ever said. This time Bob was surprised. So surprised, that he didn’t know what to say.  

“I—“  but he didn’t have time to finish, for Becky had started to say something. 

“Thank you,” she whispered. Right then, they had a moment. It was a very touching, lasting, loving moment. Bob almost forgot the reason he was there.  

“I’ve come to take you to a mutant school, where they teach mutants like you and me,” he said. 

“But I live here,” she replied, turning back to the oven, to check the unicorn. 

Bob shrugged, “Your choice, but it is the safest place for mutants like you. And on the pamphlet it says that we have the best choice of lily’s growing in our gardens.” 

“Whatev, I’ll think about it,” then taking the unicorn out of the oven, “Wanna taste? It’s a good flave!” 

With that, Bob gave her the pamphlet, took a bite of the unicorn, and left.  

             ****** 

“What are you talking about?” Bobby Jo asked, while fighting on the phone with the manger of Chef’s Table, Amano something something.  

“Ms. McCallister,” he said, trying to stay calm, “We are not trying to cause you inconvenience, but we are pretty sure that you stole one of our pepper shakers. To avoid any more trouble, we would deeply appreciate it, if you would just come back and return it.” 

“I didn’t steal your stupid pepper shaker!” Bobby Jo still fought. She rarely peppered the food she ate.  

“Madame, if you do not return that pepper shaker, then I’m afraid we will have to bring in the law,” he said, started to get annoyed. 

“Don’t you call me Madame, you psycho! I am not married!” And everyone who took a French class knew that you were called Madame if you were married, Madamemoiselle if you weren’t. “It’s Madamemoiselle to you! Bubbo!” 

“Madamemoiselle, if you do not return that pepper shaker then I am afraid I will have to sue!” 

“Why….would…I…steal….a….DUMB PEPPER SHAKER????!!!!!” Bobby Jo then exploded. Her Jamba Juice started dropping out of her mouth, she quickly wiped it off her face with a Jamba Juice napkin, swallowed, and started again. “You know what mister? Do you wanna go? Cause if you do, I’m ready for you! You better watch your back!” It was then that she hung up. She got into her car and mumbled to herself all the way to her apartment. “Why would I steal a pepper shaker? That’s totally weird. AND I’M NOT WEIRD! Why don’t they call any of their other guests? Why did they have to call me? I didn’t steal a pepper shaker!” 

Bobby Jo arrived at her apartment, got out of her car, locked the car doors(for she was afraid someone would steal it), and started walking up the long stairs (her apartment was the top one on the top floor, the sixth floor). But, alas, she was stopped by her friend, Bonnie.  

“Hey, there’s been some,” Bonnie paused, “trouble,” raised two eyebrows, “big trouble.” Bobby Jo and Bonnie then ran up to the top floor, entered their apartment, pressed the nose of the man in their painting (who had very nice cheekbones, mind you), the wall opened up, and they both slid down the two firemen poles that appeared. They reached the bottom, and were dressed as Batman and Robin (Bobby Jo as batman, and Bonnie as robin). They entered the bat cave. Their apartment building wasn’t really an apartment building at all, but Bobby Jo’s Batman hideout! 

Both of them got into their smoking hot black Batmobile, and started driving toward, the trouble.  

“Where is the,” pause, “trouble,” Bobby Jo asked.  

“Down at the south entrance of the,” pause, “Orem Public Library,” Bonnie answered. 

“What is the,” pause, “trouble?” Bobby Jo asked. 

“I don’t know, but we better drive faster, someone’s chasing us!” Bonnie sqeaked, in a very manly way, for that was what she was supposed to try to be, manly.  

“Tis true Robin! Brace yourself for the rocket speed!” Bobby Jo looked in his Batview mirror, and saw a little yellow buggy with a bunch of crazy girls with signs that said “I love you Robin!” Twas rather annoying, for they weren’t really boys, but girls. Still, Bobby Jo was comforted by the fact that they were always more crazy for young Robin.   

They pulled up in front of the south entrance of the Orem Public Library. 

“Oh my nose!” cried Bobby Jo. “What is this insanity?” 

“It is” pause “trouble,” Bonnie replied.  

“Yes, I see that,” Bobby Jo responded. Seven gorillas wearing purple striped t-shirts were waving pepper shakers in the air. Sitting in a director’s chair was a tall man with bright orange skin and pink hair. He was grinning evilly.